Vietnam is a country with a variety of cultures and traditions. One of the common customs practiced by Vietnamese people is the culture of respecting parents (kính trọng người lớn tuổi).
This culture is reflected in the strong philosophy of Confucianism. One of the main principles of Confucianism is filial piety (hiếu), which emphasizes the respect and obedience of children to their parents and ancestors.
This value is also embedded in family traditions that are passed down from generation to generation and are continuously practiced in various aspects of daily life, from how to communicate to practicing religious rituals.
Respect for elders is not just a matter of good manners, but also a widely held moral and social obligation. Here are some important aspects of the culture of respect for elders in Vietnam.
Use of Language and Greetings to Older People
In general, in Vietnamese family genealogy, grandparents hold the highest status and respect. For certain families, grandparents, or great-grandparents, may hold the highest honor.
Children and younger people are taught to use polite and respectful language when speaking to their elders. The use of the words ông (grandfather) or bà (grandmother), "bác" for uncle or aunt, or cô or chú (uncle or aunt on the father's or mother's younger sibling's side of the family), are some examples of greetings used when speaking to older people, even if they are not related.
Ancestor Worship
Honoring ancestors is also part of Vietnamese culture. Many Vietnamese homes have ancestral altars, where family members pay their respects by lighting incense and presenting offerings.
On big days like Tet (Lunar New Year in Vietnam), families will gather together to honor their ancestors and pray for good luck and health in the new year.
Other traditions involved in paying respect to ancestors include the tradition of ceremonies commemorating the deaths of ancestors. This ceremony is a form of remembering their services during their previous lives.
Attitude and Behavior
Children and younger people are taught to be submissive and obedient to their parents, grandparents, and other elderly family members. They will show respect through gestures such as bowing, greeting their parents respectfully, addressing them with a special greeting, and prioritizing their needs and wants.
Children will try to take care of their parents, both physically and emotionally. They have an obligation to take care of their parents in their old age, both financially and emotionally. They will also try to provide the elderly with happiness and comfort.
Obey the Advice of Older People
There are children who have the obligation to care for their parents in their old age, there are also parents who have a role to provide advice to the family. Family decisions often involve consideration and approval from older family members.
This philosophy has been embedded in many families in Vietnam. In the family structure in Vietnam, generally parents as the head of the family provide guidance, support, and protection to their children. As for children, they show obedience, fear, and gratitude to their parents.
This is part of the harmony and unity that is upheld in Vietnamese families. Respect for elders is shown in the way they speak and behave. Conflicts and disputes are usually avoided. If there is something that is not right, there must be various efforts made to resolve the dispute peacefully in order to maintain harmony.
Senior Citizens Day in Vietnam
Every June 6, Vietnam celebrates Senior Citizens Day. This day is intended to appreciate the role of parents and the elderly. According to vovworld.vn, some jargons such as “respect the superior, yield to the inferior” or “respect the elderly, achieve longevity” are one of the old traditions and beautiful cultural characteristics of the Vietnamese nation.
The culture of respect for elders in Vietnam is a culture that is highly valued and maintained in Vietnamese society. This respect is reflected in language, behavior, and roles in the family that are inherent in tradition.
These values remain an important foundation in the social structure and family life in Vietnam, especially in the modern era. They are essential for building good relationships and communicating effectively in Vietnam, and can be an example for people outside Vietnam as well.
References:
Vinpearl. (2024). Vietnamese Family: An Insight Into Timeless Cultural Values. vinpearl.com/en/vietnamese-family-life#:~:text=Children%20are%20taught%20from%20a,prioritizing%20their%20needs%20and%20preferences.
RRI.co.id. (2024). Hari Keluarga di Vietnam, Jaga Aspek Budaya Konfusianisme. www.rri.co.id/internasional/788194/hari-keluarga-di-vietnam-jaga-aspek-budaya-konfusianisme
Vov World. (2013). Adat Keluarga, Ciri Budaya Tradisional dalam Arus Integrasi. vovworld.vn/id-ID/kebudayaan-vietnam/adat-keluarga-ciri-budaya-tradisional-dalam-arus-integrasi-196817.vov
Vov World. (2021). Hari Lansia Vietnam : Keindahan di Umur Sore Hari. vovworld.vn/id-ID/media/hari-lansia-vietnam-keindahan-di-umur-sore-hari-990005.vov
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